I submitted a manuscript to a publisher, and got my first real rejection message today…
What the message said: “your project does not appear to be a fit for us at this time, and so we will have to pass.”
What I read: “Not only is your book lame, but you have a lot of nerve expecting anyone to like it. You should register your typing fingers as lethal weapons and have your manuscript hermetically sealed and dropped into the deepest part of the ocean. And please, do not let anyone else touch your manuscript unless they are wearing a hazmat suit. Then, destroy your computer and disassemble the desk on which you created this travesty.”
Actually, I think I handled this quite well.